Travel back to France, Take 3 (Epically long Entry for an Epically Long Trip)

As I laid down in bed yesterday evening around 9:30pm (France time) I couldn't help but review the past few days of travel/attempted travel that I had experienced. It all started last Monday, June 14. I had just spent the most incredible day ever with 2 of the best ladies on the face of the planet in Chicago. With tears in our eyes and heavy hearts we said good bye as my mom and I dropped Holly and Stephlo off at the airport to head back to Denver. I had to be at the airport just a couple hours after that, so my mom and I went to get some lunch while waiting. Finally, it was my turn to head to the airport.

Stand By Explanation: I was flying stand by back to France. When flying stand by on international flights one must arrive and check in with the ticket agents no more and no less than 4 hours (2 hours for domestic flights) ahead of one's scheduled flight time. You do this to be signed in as one of the first on the stand by list. However, in the world of stand by passengers I travel what used to be known as a D3 status (not sure what the name of this status is these days). There's D1 (highest stand by priority) D2 (2nd) and D3 (last). So all D1s and D2s get on the flights before D3 no matter what time they sign in.

Back to the story, my mom lovingly dropped me off around 12:30pm and I waited for a half hour to check in at one for my flight that left at 5pm. I always have multiple books with me on my carry on for when I travel, but often times there's also much entertainment to be had just watching other people in the airport. So after watching a whole police/fireman/ambulance scene transpire right before my eyes (my eyes pretended not to watch so I wouldn't make the disoriented lady feel self-conscious, but I have to admit that I was side-watching out of the corner of my eyes) and reading my book for 6 1/2 hours (the flight was delayed) my flight was finally boarding. The flight was PACKED. While waiting to board I get the instant play by play from my mom, and it was looking grim for me. It was oversold and there were 25 stand by passengers in line ahead of me. Needless to say I didn't get on the flight.

No problem, I'll just collect my baggage and go to my folks house and try again tomorrow (or so I thought). Turns out that collecting your baggage as a stand by who didn't get on a flight takes FOREVER. To top it off there were a plethora of cancelled flights that day, so it ended up taking 3 hours to get my bag back from the baggage claim area! I had time to finish my book and start another one.

At 9pm that night we drove back to Naperville. Whew! Having looked at the stand by list for the next day, and the day after that, and the day after that, etc.... my mom let me know that it was not looking good for flights out of Chicago. So we had to change our game plan. I took Tuesday off, and chilled at my folks house to recoup and then retried on Wednesday. Here was the plan:

1) Take an 8am flight to LaGuardia Airport in New York
2) Pick up luggage in LaGuardia
3) Find and take a shuttle from LaGuardia to JFK Airport in New York
4) Wait around till the 5:45pm flight from JFK to CDG Airport in Paris
5) Arrive in Paris and get bags at 7:30am and wait around till my flight from Paris to Toulouse at 1:50pm
6) Meet Cam at the Toulouse airport at 3:15pm and drive an hour home

All almost went to plan, I woke up at 4:15 am to get to the airport by 6am to check in for my flight at 8am. Only, I didn't get on the 8am flight to LaGuardia! No fear, for there was another flight at 8:45am, so I ran over to that gate...couldn't get on that one either. It's OK, there was another flight at 9:30am...NO ROOM ON THAT FLIGHT EITHER! After checking in with my mom, we decided it might be a better idea to fly to Dallas and then take a flight from Dallas to Paris. I went to speak with a ticket agent to see if they could switch me over, and he informed me that my bag had already been put on a flight to LaGuardia. So, scrap the Dallas plan.

The same agent then took pity on me (I must have looked a little frazzled) and told me to go check in at a different gate quick because there was a plane leaving right now that could take me. I sprinted over to that gate, my backpack bouncing on my back like it did when I was in grade school and I was going to be late for recess, but when I got there the screen read "Boston flight 343". BOSTON?!?!?! I didn't want to go to Boston, my bag was in New York...WHAT THE HELL? Then I overheard the ticket agent say the flight was full to top it all off. I ran back to the other gate pushing fellow travelers out of my way, and told the original ticket agent that I wanted to go to LaGuardia, not BOSTON. He said, "Ya, go back to that gate, they'll take you!" in a nice way, so I realized I must have read the screen wrong.

One final sprint took me back to the "Boston" gate (which still said it was going to Boston) but by this time I wasn't sure which way was up or down so I checked in at the gate. I told the new agent "I need to get to LaGuardia", she said "Ya" and took my name and started typing. She was not the talkative type, so I realized I was going to have to make every question count. As she was printing me off a boarding pass I asked one final time "Is this flight going to LaGuardia?" "Ya" she said curtly...so I got on the plane and hoped to god that I got to where my luggage was.

2 1/2 hours later I flew into LaGuardia. I found my bag which had arrived there 2 hours ahead of me, and I found the bus to JFK in record time. Arriving at JFK I then had 6 1/2 more hours to wait till my Paris flight. No worries, I was armed with a murder mystery book...super creepy and interesting (it's entitled: Still Life with Crows...very good, thanks Elise!). Finally, 7 hours later (the ticket agents were late) it was time to board the plane. I was the 2nd to last passenger put on the plane (for those of you that know my planning ahead type personality, you can only imagine the lessons I've learned through traveling stand by).

When I got on the flight I realized that my radio didn't work. "No worries" I thought, "I'll just read". 5 minutes later they turned the lights off on the flight, and my personal overhead light didn't work either. Stuck in the dark with no headset to watch the movie, I decided that this was a sign that I was supposed to sleep, and so I tried to sleep (I definitely woke myself up once with a snort, so I at least got a couple minutes sleep). After a 7 1/2 hour flight we arrived in Paris, I picked up my luggage and then went to wait for another 6 hours to take my flight from Paris to Toulouse. My eyes were having trouble staying open, I was almost to the point of sleep walking.

However, there was an outrageous occurrence as I checked in for this flight. A lady was wearing a short miniskirt, and must not have been thinking because she bent over from the waist to get something out of her bag and flashed her wedgy to the whole line behind her! The two guys next to me thought it was great...poor lady!

To end this incredibly long entry, I finally got to Toulouse. After waiting for an hour for my bag to arrive (which was pretty hilarious because we watched a bunch of French people get irate and almost crawl into the baggage loading area while yelling at the bag handlers-who were probably on strike due to the new retirement age law), Cam and I were finally able to head home!

One LONG ASS trip to add to my collection!
THE END

Cam's Science Experiments

I must confess: I love experiments. 

In fact, I'm fairly certain that my life is a long series of trial and error events that frequently lead somewhere other than the expected result.  Many of my experiments have become passions while others have fizzled into unrecognizable blobs, destined to be cleaned up one day (like my truck).  While most of you have been around for many of the things, here are a few that I have been reflecting on recently while meddling with my latest experiment...Gardening. 

Cooking: 
Hypothesis: Edible nourishment can be created by combining various "food" items and using "modern" technology like ovens, spatulas, and 200hp deluxe food processors.
Method:  Open refrigerator, grab minimum of 5 ingredients, prepare in the quickest possible way that requires the least amount of energy.
Observations:  Food seems to burn unusually easy; may be a glitch in the cooking methodology (see following).  Step 1. Put all items in skillet and place on burner.  Step 2: stir occasionally.  Step 3: Cat knocks something over and breaks it.  Step 4: chastise the cat, clean up the broken object, do internet research for cat shock collars.  Step 5: Turn off smoke alarm, return to skillet of charcoal briquettes that were once recognizable as pieces of food. 
Result:  Mediocrity bordering on an ongoing stomach ache. 
Conclusions:  If you can find it in the kitchen, I can overcook it.  Greatest success found with foods that start with "Mexican" and end with "spicy". 

Foosball: 
Hypothesis: If you devote a ridiculous amount of time to something that requires fine motor skills and physics (like batting a little red ball back and forth), you will eventually learn profound things about yourself.   
Method:  Quit climbing, going outside, and all activities in general.  Buy a foosball table.  Spend 8-12 hours per day doing the same thing over and over, hoping that the result will be different "next" time. 
Observations: Small, seemingly imperceptible changes in direction can have very profound results on the eventual trajectory of objects.  Understanding the game, the variables, strategy, and being capable to "execute" your plan will allow you to have greater chances at success, but will not guarantee it.  There is always a random and unanticipated element to the game that can define whether you win or lose; often this element of chance surfaces at the most important times and can either leave you feeling uplifted and relieved, or crushed and discouraged.  

Result: A very mediocre foosball game full of faults, tells, and frustration, but a new understanding and method of approaching the game. 
Conclusions:  Without a doubt, foosball was one of the most beneficial and profound experiments I have ever done.  It was also a great way to get tendinitis in wierd places and be ruthlessly mocked by all non "foos" friends. 

My Truck: 
Hypothesis:  Every object has a purpose...even the ones that some would deem as "Trash". 
Method:  Insert gas, change oil occasionally, but only clean truck when ABSOLUTELY necessary, which is essentially never.
Observations: On a long enough timeline, in the right environment, plastic will begin to decompose. Biological waste on the other hand, generally breaks down much faster -- except for baby clams (anonymously duct taped into the door panel...Matt) and stashed cans of tuna, which fester and create an ungodly nauseating stench that never really goes away.

Result: Thousands of miles and memories.  There's always something to write on and you can use an assortment of random objects to McGuyver just about anything...like a Slim Jim to break into your own truck after you lock the keys inside.  Scraps of paper that remind you of cool people you met 3 years ago and lame people you left behind in high-school. 
Conclusions:  Don't clean the car.  You're being environmentally responsible by starting (and perhaps finishing) the decomposition process.  Think of it as mobile composting, one step closer to sustainable living.  You could also take it to the next logical step by planting a small pine tree in your compost on your bumper.  I've heard there have been studies that show pine trees thrive with increased CO2, so it would be a perfect way to reduce emissions while fully maximizing your car's potential. 


The current experiment:
The Garden....Pics to follow....

The Nakeds

Picture this...you're walking down the streets of Barcelona...

Wall to wall people: look left- there's a mass of German tourists straight of the bus, look right-there's an even larger mass of Japanese tourists shooting pictures blinding you with their camera flashes. Everyone looks the same: heads, shoulders, arms, legs, hair or no hair, glasses or no glasses, clothes....

or no clothes?????

Eye stimulation was everywhere. Cam, Elise and I had spent the past two days walking around the city gathering an arsenal of beautiful pictures of all that the city of Barcelona had to offer. Between the enormous market just off the side street of the Ramblas and the Sagrada de Familia- the church that Gaudi designed and is under permanent construction to be finished in the distant future- our heads were overflowing with Catalunyan culture! It was spectacular.

At the particular moment referenced above, we had just spent an entire day walking all over the city. Our brains were saturated, and brain function took a couple seconds longer to process than normal. Elise and I were walking next to each other with Cam trailing a few steps behind (although Cam can out-hike most people on any mountainside, when you get him traveling he walks slower than any snail I've met). ;)

We were walking down the Ramblas (a famous tourist street in Barcelona) and I was observing all the funny fellow tourists around me, when I noticed a couple of men that somehow just didn't fit in with the rest of the crowd. Focusing in on them, I wondered, "Hmmm....something is different about those guys. What is it? It looks like that old man has a lot of tattoos...is that it? No, though old guys with lots of tattoos aren't totally normal, there's something even stranger about these guys." As I reflected on why these two men struck me as looking so strange, it hit me like a ton of bricks...: "I see their penises!!!! They have no clothes on!" Then I realized that they had no body hair either...they had definitely prepared for this moment for a while! I knew there was something different about them! There was an older man and a young man just trompsing down the most crowded street in all of Barcelona totally buck naked!

Suddenly, when I realized what was happening, I turned to Elise, "Elise, do you see their weeners??? They have no clothes on!" Of course, Elise had realized this fact without my help. After the initial shock waned I noticed that there was a crowd of people following the naked men snapping pictures of the onlookers (Elise and me included), who must have had their jaws fully ajar coupled with hilariously shocked expressions on their faces. I immediately picked my bottom jaw up off the ground and passed the "Nakeds". I had to get just one more glimpse after I had passed them (I mean how often do you get to see two naked, completely shaved men walking down the middle of the street) and noticed the old man had what looked like the butt of a swimming speedo tattooed on his butt! At least he covered his bottom for us all, how proper of him.

Needless to say, Cam, Elise and I laughed the whole way home remembering that scene...crazy naked people in Barcelona! ;)

A Glimpse of Cathar Country

Ariège has a ton of interesting chateaus, castles and ruins that date back to the 13th century.  Although these sites have long archeological histories, many of them were defined by a short period of time of religious persecution, the effects of which may still be seen on today's landscape.  

Catharism was a sect of Christianity that contradicted certain fundamental Catholic doctrine during the middle ages.  As a result, Pope Innocent III declared Catharism a heresy and authorized a crusade in order to eliminate the opposition to the Catholic Church.  The Cathars, a great many of whom lived in the southeast of France, were hunted down and brutally murdered (usually by being burnt alive).  In order to fend off the crusaders, many Cathar fled to seemingly impenetrable fortified chateaus atop rocky buttresses.  

Living in this Ariège, it is impossible not to notice these buildings towering over the landscape below.  Many of them have fallen into disrepair of the centuries, some were destroyed by the crusaders, and fewer still remain relatively intact (or were reconstructed), but all of them have a fascinating story which has been awesome to explore.  

Elise and Hanan exploring and imagining what the Chateau of Roquefixade, a Cathar stronghold near Foix, might have looked like 700 years ago.  

Elise and Hanan trying to imagine what it would be like to get a clear photo of the elusive Colorado mountain troll. 

Fêtes des Fleurs - Cazères

Continuing the tradition of local festivals, last weekend was the annual Fêtes des Fleurs in Cazères, which consists of a variety of activities, including a parade of floats adorned with flowers.  Despite being small, the parade was fun and entertaining. In sharp contrast to American parades, where the parade route is guarded vehemently by police and barriers, the Fêtes des Fleurs parade was relaxed, low key and hardly regulated. 

In fact, much of the parade seemed to consist of people just enjoying themselves, like this group of ladies, who were walking along, laughing and having a good time and seemed somewhat oblivious to the fact that they were in the middle of a parade.  Here they stopped for a quick snapshot, before continuing on to the next camera person who was waiting another 5 feet down the road.  

I milled in and out of the paraders for most of the time, which was far more fun than just standing in a crowd of sweaty people, trying to look over someone's shoulder to see the floats roll by.  Granted, we were in a small town, with a small parade and this may not be representative of the greater French culture, but I would say that it was refreshing.

Lots of stuff going on...

Things are a bit hectic around here for the moment, but we've been doing lots of cool stuff and will post things in more detail as we get more time.  But, for now, a few pics...

A weekly market in Rieux Volvestre. Steph and Elise picking through the produce and learning how to manage market crowds/lines.

We also went to a "Vide Grenier," which translates literally as "empty the attic".  It is basically the French equivalent of a town wide yard sale, where people try to sell all the random junk that have been collecting dust for the last who knows how long.  Needless to say, there are a ton of intriguing and slightly bizarre objects that appear...everything from clothes, to climbing shoes (size 42 Mythos if anyone is interested), to religious relics, dishes, rusty tools... the list is endless.  This ice axe thermometer caught my eye because it seemed lonely and out of place among all of the other, very clearly non-climber objects. 

The Vide Grenier is also excellent for people watching.  We happened to see this couple dressed up as clowns, who proceeded to randomly approach people and do clown things much to the amusement of everyone around, especially Elise and I.  In fact, we both stopped at the exact same time to take a photo of them.  I would say that clowns are not a normal occurrence, but it was indubitably entertaining nonetheless.